Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Do you think I have lost my mind....

Look at what I have done.....


Aren't they just too sweet...I know what you are thinking, I haven't completely lost it, maybe just a little bit...but let me tell you why...well, last night while getting in to bed I was thinking about this whole FET thing we've done, the one that has felt so surreal up until now and all of a sudden this thought popped into my head "well, who says it's gonna work this time, I mean really what's different and why should it"

And so it began, the doubts....I was hoping that they'd stay away a little longer but where there is hope....so today when my angel (that lady at work I was telling you about) came to pray for me, I told her that I was scared and that what if it didn't work! She told me (ever so calmly and as if she knows something that I don't know) that I need to believe and have faith, God will help me.

And so, I decided to get something to help me believe, something to help me have faith and so today after work, I went and bought 3 little vests, one for each of my littlies...Love, Hope and Faith.

I was also chatting to a lady that's temping by us at the moment (it's such a small world) she also went to Vitalab and has a 3 year old little boy from her very last FET and she was telling me that I need to visualise my little embies and see them growing and implanting, now I don't have a very good imagination but tonight that is what I am gonna try...

I also need to remind myself of a few things, this cycle is different from my IVF and will work because:
  • I was so much less stressed this time
  • My embies where grown for a little bit longer than my others so they must be stronger
  • They did assisted hatching on them this time which they say helps them break out and implant
  • This cycle was more natural, I didn't have all those hormones floating around in me, making me crazy
  • My lining was actually thicker this time round
  • My bladder was so full this time that it made my transfer much smoother (will post comparison scans soon)
  • There are three instead of two, so that should higher our chances for even a singleton pregnancy

That's all I can think of for now, it also helps that there are loads of women out there that FET's have been successful for, this needs to work!!

Other than starting to lose my mind, things are all fine...feeling very normal, just waiting for the progesterone to kick in!! Not that much longer to go tho, 9 more days!!!

13 comments:

Bumble said...

Oooh Tam they are just gorgeous, and no, I don't think you're losing your mind. Whatever helps you to keep this dream alive and have faith in your little three. Can't wait till I can also buy a little something (or three) for the cuties... Hang in there, the 2nd will be here before you know it!! xxx

anna said...

What beautiful little onesies! You WILL have babies to dress in those onesies...you'll see! As a psychiatrist, I should be allowed to tell you that you're officially not losing your mind! I'll let you know if I see any signs though ;) I'm thinkin of you and your little sticky embies and sending you all good vibes!

Becks said...

I dont think you are mad. I think I should be more positive....so this time around I might take a leaf out of your book. Good luck, it wont be long till the beta, fingers crossed hun.

Chanti said...

Ag man!!! Those are to cute! Personally I think you very brave to have bought those for your littlies. I pray with all my heart and everything I've got that this works out for you and for Mands. After all you guys have been through I think it's your time to shine. So hang in there and keep on believing and visualizing your littlies grow.
Lots of love
Chantel

Kate said...

I think they are VERY cute! :)

Mands said...

Tam I don't think it's crazy at all... you've just done what most of us to afraid to do. I bought a pregnancy mag, and then hid it away in my nightstand!
I am so hopeful about this FET, and I believe that we will hearing very good news from you soon!
Love
Mands xx

butterflyanla said...

Hoping and praying for you and yoru embies.

Carrie said...

I've missed a chunk of what's going on with you (sorry, bloglines doesn't point me here anymore and I've been on holiday)
So you've been and done a FET! How exciting. I really hope this will be it for you. I don't think you're mad at all. I really think that a positive attitude might make the difference.
It is hard to hope, but then it is hard if you don't.
All the best, thinking of you xx

Leah said...

Those are adorable! I don't think you are crazy at all. I love and admire your optimism and faith.

Almost a week into the wait, I'm on pins and needles for you!

Baby Blues said...

You're in my thoughts! I'm right here sending good vibes and waiting with you.

JJ said...

TOO cute...you arent crazy! I hope you get to use those SOON! Hoping and praying for you friend...

Foreverhopeful said...

So cute!! I don't think you are crazy either.. JUST a girl with a lot of faith and optimism. I totally love and admire that about you. I'm thinking of you and your little embies - FAITH, HOPE AND LOVE.

ultimatejourney said...

What a great way to honor your embies! I can't believe you're more than halfway through the 2ww now! Best wishes, hon.