Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Not so sure anymore...

It's now only one more sleep until my Beta, all the lovely symptoms that I was having are gone...and so is the hope. I have a bad feeling about the outcome of this cycle i'm afraid.

The good news is that i'm not crying yet, so my hormones seem to be holding up on that front at least.

I will be going for my beta at about 9:30 tomorrow and will have the results at the latest 11am. I am as nervous as hell and really really hate this part of having treatments, that phone call is always the worst. There is a little part of me that is still hoping that it will be a nice phone call for a change, the one where they tell me to stay on the progesterone - not stop it.

BUT....

That same old feeling of failure is already creeping back in, please God....just for once, make it good news....please, please, please.

P.S. - It's my Dad's birthday today, I so wish that I could give him a belated birthday present tomorrow, he would be so happy....finally.

8 comments:

Sarah said...

it is normal for symptoms to suddenly go away (and for hope to play tricks on you). i'm crossing all my fingers and toes and every hair on my head for you!

ultimatejourney said...

You just never know how it will end until you get that phone call. I really hope you're wrong.

Sticky Bun said...

Those symptoms are the cruelest trick for us infertiles, because no matter what symptoms you're having (or not having) it seems to have little bearing on the outcome. So, I'm SO hoping for a pleasant call tomorrow and a wonderful belated bday gift for your dad. Thinking of you!

Reproductive Jeans said...

Damn symptoms--its just another added unfair gesture with all the things we deal with in the land of IF. I am HOLDING onto hope that it is great news with that phone call!

Nicole said...

I've got all my digits crossed for you and am anxiously waiting to hear about the beta level. Good luck!

Bumble said...

Oh Tam, you know I'm wishing for that birthday present for your dad. And thinking of you tomorrow, let me know if you need me, and SMS me when you know. Please God... xxx

Aunt Sassy said...

Like others said... everything crossed (so hard i think my pinky toe is turning blue.. the things we do for fellow infertiles:) ). Hang in there... will be checking in for your news!

Adrienne said...

I'm keeping my fingers and toes and other parts crossed for you, Tam. Good luck tomorrow.