Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Updates...and Rocking girl bloggers!!

No, I haven’t fallen off the edge of blogland, I’ve been quite busy lately so I haven’t had much time to blog. I have however been trying to keep up with your blogs…there is just so much happening out there at the moment, so many of you ladies are now pregnant and are living from day to day, from scans to scans….some of you are waiting for beta’s – I wish you all the best of luck!!

There is really not much happening on my side, I am sure that I am more than half way through my 2ww by now, this cycle was so confusing, my 4 day long EWCM never corresponded with my temp rise so now I wait for AF to come so that I can really pin-point when I O’d. Weird stuff I tell you, it’s funny how much the IVF drugs have messed up my cycles, I think that this cycle will be about 33 days which is better than a 39 day cycle but still quite a bit longer than the 26 day cycles I am used to.

As a result of my cycle being so screwed up, the DIY thing never worked that well…so I think we missed O by quite a few days so there really is the slightest chance that it may have worked but I’m not getting my hopes up, in fact…for the first time in a long time, I wont be devastated when AF shows, I will however be very surprised if she doesn’t…It feels good to not worry about it, to not analyse every twitch and every symptom and to just be.

Frank and I have been having some really good times with friends and you know that I would be lying if I said that being childless didn’t still bother me, I do still think about it, in fact as time passes, I am starting to think about it even more. I have not told Frank, I’m letting him enjoy the break but I am starting to think about our FET, I think that I’ll be ready for it quite soon, when I say quite soon I am hoping for October/November so that is still a little while away. We are planning to go away in the first week or so of November and ideally I would like to have had my transfer already so that we can really take it easy but with my cycles being so screwy, it’s not easy to work out if the would even be an option. All I know is that I don’t want to cycle anywhere close to Christmas and New year, last year we were in our first IUI 2ww over Christmas and I found out on New years day that it hadn’t worked, not the way I want to start a new year this time round!! So I suppose we’ll see how it goes…but I do think of my little embies often and wonder if just maybe they are going to make me a mommy soon!

In other news, Mands and I met for brunch on this past Saturday, it was wonderful seeing her again, it’s so nice to have personal contact with someone that really gets me, it’s different talking to a fellow IF than talking to other friends that just.don’t.get.it, the ones who stare blankly at you and ask the same question 10 thousand times – geez, not usre where that came from - as I was saying, Mands is real special, such a sweet, down to earth soul and I can really sense the beginning of a beautiful friendship. I am wishing you all the best with your up-coming IVF sweetie, maybe we’ll be cyclesista’s!! Let’s hope we can bring our little ones up together!!

So now, down to the rocking girl bloggers!!

1. Janine from Me the bumblebee – Janine is such a special soul, when I think of Janine I think of her as being my twin soul, we have that connection. She has also been there during the hard times and I know that I can always count on her no matter how she is feeling at the time. I wish that we were closer but even tho we are far apart I know that we have a friendship that will last a lifetime! Her blog has touched so many of us through the way that she is so open and honest, a very special soul indeed! I am so happy for her aswell, she has been on this IF rollercoaster way too long!

2. Anna from Anna's parapraxis - I only started reading Anna's blog at the beginning of her IVF which wasn't that long ago...I really connected with Anna and it's really weird but I feel so close to her. I can totally relate to the way Anna's says things and am also hoping for the best now that she is pregnant!

3. Mands from The secret Garden - I have said quite a bit about Mands above but also want to add that she is such a positive person and I love that about her, hoping that your journey ends soon my friend.

4. Sticky bun - I have been reading sticky's blog since the very beginning of my blog, this is one blogger that I can totally relate too, she also says it how it is and isn't afraid to let the raw feelings of IF come pouring out, she has a wonderful balance between strength and sensitivity. Here's to the two little stickies you have growing inside you sweetie!!

5. JJ from Reproductive Jeans - I think that JJ has to have been chosen more than once, I see JJ as the centre of our blogesphere, JJ pulls us all together. She has some wonderful idea's and just brings us all together. JJ also has the most wonderful way of putting thing, her writing is beautiful and I think that we all love JJ! I hope your journey ends soon JJ!

I wish that I knew all of you in person, you are all very special ladies!


Reproductive Jeans said...

You seriously just made me cry....that is the sweetest thing for you to say. I was having a blue day, and you totally just changed that. Thank you SO much.
And you definitely deserve this nod too!
Sounds like you and Frank are getting ready for the next step--I just want so much for the FET to work out--for both of us!!
Hugs Tam--you are the sweetest!

Bumble said...

Aaaw Tam, thanks so much for the sweet words my little twin soul. You know I'm always here for you even across the miles, and I can't wait to share your pregnancy with you. So happy to hear you're almost ready for your little frosties, I'm praying every day that they bring you and Frank the family you so want and deserve. Its your turn now Tam. xxx

anna said...

Way to mess with my hormonal, over-emotional state! I'm touched that you chose me as one of your 5...seriously, perhaps too touched, but this means a lot to me. I know it's silly but I've already imagined coming to South Africa on vacation, us with our little one and you also either pregnant or with a little one(s) as well...that will truly be a special day when we can meet each other and the families we've both desperately wanted. Not only does the DIY have promise, but most definitely the little frozen embies have serious potential to make my dream come true for you!
Thanks, Tam, for being such a beautiful, supportive, and loving person. Big hugs from this side of the pond!

Leah said...

I'm glad you haven't deserted us in blogland completely. I've missed you! I especially miss you since you were my cyclesista last time. :-(

I will be hopeful for your DIY cycles because, damnit, you deserve for SOMETHING to go right and be easy.

Foreverhopeful said...

Just wanted to wish you luck with this cycle. Even though you think its a bust, I hope you are pleasantly surprised. If not, your FET will be here before you know it and I wanted to wish you luck. I know what you mean about not wanting to do a cycle before the holidays. I had one IVF where I got my AF on Christmas day. NICE!!?? And it ruined my holidays. Sometimes breaks are good and I'm glad you are enjoying yourself with friends.

Mands said...

I had a great time as well at our little brunch! It always seems like we have so much to talk about :-)
I really hope that we both have good news before the end of the year - then we'll have even more to chat about over coffe.
I think you are a very special person too Tam, very honest and open - qualities I really admire.
Thank you for my nomination :-) I don't feel like I always serve the blogging community that well, but it's really nice to be acknowledged.